I can’t be alone in this…

Maybe I’m living under a metaphorical rock.
I mean, it’s totally conceivable. I work, on average, around 60 hours a week, and spend my weekends making sure to take care of the day-to-day mundanities involved with being an adult. I like to think I’m not living under a rock, though. I read the news, I’m pretty active on Facebook.
But every now and again, I see something posted that makes my stomach drop and my breath catch in my throat.
It’s almost always something about feminism and women’s rights. And most of the time, it’s coming from someone, usually male, in my industry. It’s so easy for me to forget that I work in an industry that is largely comprised of a male workforce. What does surprise me is how conservative they are (most – certainly not all), and how casually sexist they are. I’ve seen posts condemning global warming as a hoax, how “Obamacare” is the worst thing to happen to this country in the history of ever, and most recently, posts mocking and deriding Rose McGowan’s speaking out about sexism in Hollywood.
What set me off today was seeing an artist I greatly respect and admire post the tired old trope of “if feminists want true equality, they’d better expect to get hit back if they get up in a man’s face and hit him first.”
Hypothetically speaking, I guess I understand the thought. If someone were attacking me, I would certainly defend myself, gender be damned. The problem I have is that there’s still the idea that we’ve achieved true equality in all other areas already. I mean, I’m not even going to touch the issue with violence there.
This post minimizes all the other areas in which women are far from equal. We get paid less. We don’t have control over our own bodies, whether walking down the street or choosing whether or not to carry a child to term. We’re subject to constant scrutiny, no matter what decision we make. Not only is there retributive violence in the context of a fight to worry about, but there is a constant fear of violence inherent in the female experience (to say nothing of the fears of violence for transwomen – I cannot speak to their experiences, however). In my personal experience, I have to work twice as hard to prove myself as a viable professional in my field, simply because there aren’t as many women doing it. When we name off the greats, they’re all men, with few exceptions. I’ve encountered the attitude of “girls can’t do that,” and I’ve worked personally to dispel that myth. It’s still frustrating.
Even more frustrating, when women popped up in the comment thread on this post, expressing their discomfort with the sentiment, they were shouted down and discounted and were told their reactions were “part of the problem.” This person professed to loving and respecting women.
Earlier, I got into an argument with another male artist on the topic of abortion. He expressed he believed that it should be illegal for a woman to terminate a pregnancy without the consent of the man. I am of the school of thought that a woman deserves bodily autonomy, as much as anyone else, including in the context of pregnancy. A person cannot be forced to donate blood against their will. After death, a person who has not volunteered to be an organ donor cannot have their organs harvested for transplant. Yet somehow, the instant a woman conceives, she loses the right to do with her body what she desires. I said all of the above nearly verbatim, and was told it’s different when there’s a human life in question and that I was splitting hairs.
I guess what’s so mind-blowing to me is that I associate those in creative fields with a more liberal viewpoint. This could be the result of being born in and living in (for the most part) liberal, arts-focused cities. I was born in the Bay Area, and spent a majority of my life in the Pacific Northwest. I grew up around actors, painters, sculptors, classical musicians, writers, photographers… the whole gamut. Maybe it was just the particular people my parents chose to associate with, as much as the issue now could be the people I choose to surround myself with.
It’s easy to see that sexism is still rampant in Hollywood. All one has to do is look at the representation of women as characters in a film to see that. It’s also a well-known fact that has been reported on frequently as of late that the majority of directors in Hollywood are male, and that female-helmed films are a rarity. Even behind the scenes, there is a major disparity in gender representation.
I have to wonder if the attitudes I’ve encountered just by using social media are representative of the whole of the industry, or if I’ve just lucked out and found the specific ones who hold these disheartening ideas.


Facebook Douchebaggery Knows No Bounds


I do believe this says it all.

Still in Facebook Jail

I’m on day 3 of a warrantless suspension. My case is still showing as open in the support dashboard, but I have gotten no response other than the stupid form letter I got telling me I’m not a bot, so I’m allowed to log in again, but I’m still suspended over a reported image Facebook removed from the support dashboard. They removed the evidence of why I’m suspended. I’m pretty sure it’s because if it stayed, there would be proof I’m suspended for absolutely no reason other than catering to a bully. I have screenshots though.


This doesn’t exist any more.

I talked to another body painter who suffered similar harassment. She was able to suss our her harasser by involving a lawyer – they outed themselves. She told me of another artist who went through an entire legal process to force Facebook to tell her who was reporting her constantly. Another artist participated in a beta test for Facebook wherein the reported was informed who the reporter was. Why this hasn’t taken off, I don’t know. It shows that Facebook is aware of the possibility of and tendency towards abuse, but is unwilling to actually put measures in place to prevent it. I suppose they really don’t have to, unless it hits their profits.

Time to write another email.

Continued Fuckery

To recap for those just joining us:

* Me – body painter & artist
* Have a stalker that used the report button to harass me
* Facebook isn’t doing anything to protect me
* I got banned for posting x-rays
* Finally found a way to appeal after they demanded I prove I’m not a bot by sending them my drivers license

I just got an email response from Facebook. They decided I’m not a bot.

I’m still fucking banned.


Also – it apparently wasn’t the full front x-ray that was the problem.


Conveniently missing from the support dashboard is the report on the side  view x-ray that was apparently too hot for the intarwebz.


Just a reminder that’s  a thing. It existed. I took a screenshot. It goes straight from the front x-ray to the report of my profile picture.


This one. December 12th.

I’m still banned. Not even an acknowledgement of the five billion screenshots and messages I sent. Only a reminder that I’m banned for seven days for a post they removed from my queue.

So……… I sent this.


Seriously, Facebook. Get your shit together. This is the stupidest thing I’ve encountered ever in the history of ever.

And I’m not bluffing.

Facebook Continued

Hi, All,

Wow. Since posting yesterday, this blog got 1400 views. I am floored and flattered and grateful for the interest and support.

So… I got a wild hair today, and started clearing out old emails on my account. While doing so, I decided to save every email I had from Facebook in regards to their reporting system – either something of mine being reported or something I reported (I will report any extreme content I come across, such as violence, gore, encouraging violence, or pornography  – the real stuff, smartasses).


This is from August (as far back as I could go, as it looks like I did this some time in August too). The break down is this:

Total number of message threads: 15
Total number of me reporting: 3
Total number of my stuff reported: 12


Please note the circled numbers. These are messages of my content being reported with multiple messages within the thread. From the bottom, we have 14, 3, 2, and 2. The total number of my images reported from 8/15 to now is 25.


These are the ones I reported. One was pornographic video, another a pornographic photo, and the third a page encouraging brutal domestic violence as a consequence to infidelity.

Only one of those was removed for content violation. One. It was the video.

Facebook is saying with these results that extreme, brutal violence against women is just fine. Want to show a body paint where the woman’s nipples are covered with pasties or a prosthetic? Porn, and you will be banned.

Want to report something that could be harmful or dangerous? Too bad. Want to harass and bully someone? Right the fuck on.

Still no response from the Facebook support team, a full 24 hours into this fuckery. Thank you for your support.

Fuck Facebook

Hi kids. It’s been years since I posted. For that I apologize.

I know some of you follow me on Facebook. Some of you know I work as a makeup artist and body painter.


Exhibit A (Cameron S., Kayla K., and Patrick G.)


Some of you know that someone has been endlessly harassing me using that handy-dandy “Report” feature. It’s been slowly escalating. First, it was body paints. Some of them, I looked at and went “eeehhh….. I disagree, but I understand.” Then it was someone (probably the same someone) going through old albums and reporting makeups and body paint photos. I posted a link to an art gallery article about female nudes, and got banned for 24 hours. I trolled the troll with disembodied nipples, and got banned for three days (TBH… I was kinda asking for that one). Then someone reported my profile picture.

20141204_003733This, you guys. They reported this.

Nothing happened, because DUH. I figured it was a friend being a smartass.

Lately, I’ve been having some health issues, and went to the doctor last month. She ordered x-rays of my spine. I fucking love x-rays. I love seeing the insidey parts of things, especially myself. I got to take them home on a DVD. Naturally, we had to find out if we could open them on the computer. Turns out we could. So…… I posted them to Facebook.

bones, xray, censored, boobs

Back Nope Too Sexy for Facebook

So guess who’s banned for seven days.

That’s right. Someone – smartass or asshole – reported my x-rays for containing nudity or pornography…. and Facebook agreed.

I am all for the report feature. You know – the feature that’s supposed to enable Facebook users to report images of brutality. Of gore. Of pornography. Of child pornography. You know. The really nasty stuff. It SHOULD be reported. The reporting feature can be used in collaboration with law enforcement to catch the fuckers making it and posting it. I am 100% for that.

You know what I’m NOT 100% for? Using the report feature against people you don’t like. I am not for using it as a tool for bullying. I am not for using it against posts or pictures than annoy you or make you slightly uncomfortable because you might catch a glimpse of a breast. There are other nifty features like “unfriend,” “block,” or “unfollow.” They’re super cool. Here’s why reporting every teeny, insignificant little thing on Facebook that tweaks your sensibilities is a shitty thing to do.

Women’s bodies in and of themselves are not porn. I don’t know why this is even up for debate or why it has to be said. The only time women’s bodies are porn is when they’re caught on camera performing sexual acts. THAT IS THE FUCKING DEFINITION (hahahahaahahaha – I’m 12) OF PORNOGRAPHY.  Remember the Facebook breastfeeding pictures debacle? After the #Freethenipple campaign, Facebook finally backed down. How about when Facebook removed the (completely non-sexual) images of a double mastectomy survivor? It’s no secret that Facebook has a woman problem.

You know what the shittiest part is of all of this? I have almost no recourse. Facebook has deemed me a troublemaker. It’s a virtual guarantee that if anything is reported, it will get removed. I’m only a ban or two more away from having my account removed, and what’s funny, is I’ve never once posted full nudity. Not once. I also have no way to protect myself from further harassment, as the reporting system is entirely anonymous. Facebook has decided that I am the aggressor, that I am the harasser. Unless I go through a lengthy and tedious screening process to try to figure out where the one dickhead is on my friends list this will keep happening to me. Facebook makes it difficult for me to even dispute the report. I can remove images I think might possibly offend someone from my remaining albums, but who the fuck knows what that even is? I didn’t expect my x-rays to be so highly offensive. Does this mean ultrasound pictures count as a child pornography now?

Facebook seriously needs to overhaul its reporting system and acknowledge it opens the door for harassment and bullying that the victims have no way to protect themselves from. Start manually blocking people from each other if one person is reporting another over and over and over, or at least allow the reported to dispute it. I have this crazy idea that maybe – just maybe – providing a way for people to, I dunno, talk to a human being in this kind of situation could save a lot of time and trouble. Of course, Facebook makes that a total fucking nightmare.

Facebook also needs to get the fuck over the idea of female nudity and what it represents (sooooo not holding my breath).

I'm going to go do other things now and try not to explode.

I’m going to go do other things now and try not to explode.

**** Edit **** After publishing this, I checked my email. It appears my response to the Facebook support team has generated a review. Maybe we’ll get some answers. Report submitted

Time to rant again

So, initially I wanted to rant in response to an article that was forwarded to me today…. but then I looked at the insights on views on this thing… Some search terms came up, and I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.




This is a prime example of the objectification I rant about. I don’t personally care for Miley Cyrus. I think she’s an idiot celebrity. But COME ON!!! She doesn’t deserve to be objectified like that; turned into a piece of meat for some douchebag to jerk off to. She’s someone’s daughter, y’all. For fuck’s sake!!! She’s a kid, to boot. Just because she’s over 18 doesn’t mean that it automatically entitles you to drool over her and look for videos of her having sex. Fucking disgusting. I hope whoever searched that shit read this fucking blog and now feels guilty as shit. Yeah, you, asshole. I’m talking to YOU.


Now that THAT piece of disgusting news is out of the way, it’s time to move on to another disgusting piece of news.



Go read that. Seriously. I’ll wait.





Are you done reading it? Good. Notice that little piece of work came from the “Gay Voices” section of HuffPost.


Guys, I work in the haunted house industry. I’m a makeup artist and a manager at a haunt. I help kids learn how to scare the ever-living-fuck out of people. That’s my job. I’m all for exploiting phobias, and certainly homophobia is a strong one. However, I question whether or not this is socially responsible even in the slightest.

I have gay kids that work at my haunt. I do everything in my power to ensure that our haunt is a safe zone for all genders, all sexualities, all races, all religions. How could I possibly look my kids in the eye and tell them that a) I don’t judge people based on whomever they’re attracted to and b) that the haunt is a safe zone if I’m perpetuating a phobia and prejudice that is evidently still socially acceptable? Do you think the author would have had the same reaction if the scare was based on an irrational fear of black people? What if the author had been black and went through a racially themed haunt? Would the reaction have been the same?

I think not. Way to go, Mr. Solomon. Way to legitimize the fear of gay people that is rampant in society. You should be outraged that homophobia is being exploited as a way to make money at a haunt. As a journalist, your voice is the loudest and most audible when speaking about these issues. I have a measly 7 regular readers on this blog. You write for the FUCKING HUFFINGTON POST!!!!! You have an obligation to speak out on this shit, especially when you write for the Gay Voices section.

Just because a scare is effective doesn’t mean it should be used. We still have a responsibility as haunters to spread social justice. Shame on you, Black Out. Fucking shame on you. I used to really want to go visit Black Out, because I’d heard stories that it was the haunt I wanted to run, but if this is all it is, then fuck that. I’ll stick with zombies and ghouls and demons. At least at MY haunt, they can feel okay with being gay.